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Love & Sex

Every Girl Can Get Her Happy Ending

by Lana Vrzic August 23, 2018
by Lana Vrzic August 23, 2018

No matter where I seem to live in New York City, my neighbor is always a “handy shack,” aka a massage parlor that doles out happy endings. Currently, I live next to a place with a basement entrance, a neon red light, and middle-aged masseuses who wait for customers behind veiled curtains. It purports itself to be a Chinese Healing Center — hey, as we all know, there are many benefits to sexual healing. The handwritten sign in the window advertises a deal for “61 minutes.” My best friend thinks that extra minute is all the time their clients need to prematurely ejaculate, but I think it really says 69 illegibly.

We see men go and come there, and I even have a married friend who frequents it. It’s always hilarious when I catch him with a big smile on his way out. Parlors like that are a dime a dozen in the city, but nothing tops where I lived fresh out of college. The infamous Russian Turkish Bath House of the East Village was the building in my backyard. I recommend taking a gander at their video to get a sense of the experience. I myself spent many a night watching the free porn that went on in their outdoor pool, so, I was not surprised to read that they are…how should I put it… a full-service operation. However, I was surprised to find out they also offer hand jobs to women! Hooray, everyone deserves a happy ending! Since men have been openly enjoying the rub down for centuries, this is really the next step for women’s rights. Females are finally getting what we really knead, I mean, need. Thanks to this new fad, the massage glass ceiling is disappearing quicker than the ozone. And it’s not just in NYC — these spas for women that promise a “big finish” are starting to pop up across the globe, in tourist spots like Ibiza and Miami. Now you know how to spend your two weeks worth of vacation days — trading one job for another. Hey, we’ll take ‘em where we can get ‘em! [Times Online and Tango]

Original by Simcha

bath househand jobhappy endingmassagerussian turkish baths
Lana Vrzic

Lana is a dedicated writer and Editor in Chief of TheFrisky, who has been with us from the beginning. Her diverse range of interests, from technology and business to health and wellness, allows her to bring a fresh perspective to each topic she covers.

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