Princeton Mom Warns Women Have A “Shelf Life”



Last week, the world met Susan A. Patton, Princeton grad of ’77, whose uber-snobbish letter to the editor of the Daily Princetonian was heard ’round the globe. Patton’s screed, penned to “the daughters I never had,” warned the young ladies of Princeton that they should find their husbands now, in college, because men in the rest of the world are morons. You can read the whole ridiculous shitshow here, including the part where Patton kvelled about how her son, a Princeton student (of course), would be quite a catch.

This week, much to her childrens’ consternation, Princeton Mom is still talking.

CNN Money interviewed Princeton Mom, who is continuing to warn the young ladies of Princeton, New Jersey, that every day their “shelf life” is deteriorating. One day they’ll be a saggy pile of shriveled eggs that no one, not even someone who went to state school, will want to marry!

“Unlike the men on campus, these women had a time clock,” Patton told CNN Money. “Women who spend the first 10 years after college … career planning find themselves in their 30s a little panicked. From a sheer numbers perspective, the odds will never be as good to be surrounded by these extraordinary men.” figured out that Patton’s advice to Princeton ladies does not just come from the goodness of her heart. She has another motivation: a recent divorce. “My husband was not a Princetonian,” she told The Cut. “He went to a school of almost no name recognition. Almost no name recognition. A school that nobody has respect for, including him, really.”

Patton and her now-ex-husband married at 30 and lasted 27 years before their incompatibility did them in. You didn’t know the crumbling of your future marriage was predicated on where your husband went to undergrad, did you?

She added to CNN Money, “Ultimately it will frustrate you to be with a man who just isn’t as smart as you. I wish I had ended up with a Princeton man.”

Does she have her book deal yet?


Original by Jessica Wakeman

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