You’re in a committed relationship, and things are going great – except for one tiny detail: he is not popping the question. If you’ve been waiting to seal the deal for months or even years, but your partner doesn’t seem remotely close to the idea of proposing, it’s time to take a deeper look. And that’s exactly what The Pearl Source and Laguna Pearl did. As two of the largest pearl jewelry retailers in the country, the two companies joined forces and conducted a study on 1,001 American men, ranging in education, income and age. The main focus: finding out their concerns, tendencies and considerations when it comes to proposing (or, more precisely, avoiding to propose) to their partners.
The Basics and the Whys
To break it down, most interviewed men agreed that the number one reason why marriage was not yet in the picture was the fact that they were not willing to give up their freedom (13%). A good portion of the men agreed that receiving too much pressure from their partners made them postpone their ring-hunting plans (12%). And thirdly, the men stated that the burden of an expensive ring or wedding was holding them back (10%). Other valid reasons to avoid getting hitched included being too young, their partner’s debt or simply not being that into their partners (8%).
When it came to the most significant considerations before deciding to propose, the respondents agreed that the most essential aspect was the length of the relationship (42%), followed by their partner’s health and lifestyle (36%) and finances (35%). However, these particular results were not as clear-cut, as the divorced crowd agreed that the quality of sex was the number one consideration when thinking of proposing. Another important place was held by ‘cohabitation’, which was assessed as highly important when planning to pop the question.
His & Hers Money Worries
Most men (27%) agreed that their own financial worries, debt and future earning potential held a role in postponing to get married. But what might come as a surprise is the fact that men are not just worried about the state of their own finances, but also feel the pressure of their partner’s debts and potential future income. In fact, a whopping 58% of respondents agreed that their partner’s credit card situation (both income and debt) was a real worry for them. However, there is hope: the same men concluded that their partner’s debt was a worry, but only if we’re talking about very large sums (over $20,000).
The Much-Anticipated & Pricey Engagement Ring
Picking out the perfect engagement ring is definitely a stressful task, and the men in the study tended to agree. In fact, almost 50% of men agreed that finding the right bling caused them a great deal of anxiety and stress, while over 35% of the respondents claimed that their partners expect too much when it comes to the sparkly ring. Being indecisive about the style of the ring also grabbed a top spot, as well as not being in the know regarding their partner’s ring size.
A Non-Negligible Factor: Between the Sheets
If all the above reasons aren’t a concern in your particular situation and relationship, the study shows that the problem might be… in between the sheets. Namely, when interviewed about the type of sexual issues that have the potential to delay popping the question, most men agreed that not having enough sex was a valid reason. Following ‘frequency’, which gathered 30% of the responses, the partner’s promiscuity also held an important spot, as well as ‘a mundane, boring sex life’, which ranked third.