Ex-boyfriends, they say the darndest things! Most of the time, they’re blathering on is fairly harmless, but sometimes they can say things that are so egregiously clueless/insensitive/crappy that they really warrant special attention. Case in point, a couple of weeks ago, an ex of mine started telling me about his latest breakup. As he was explaining why his girlfriend had dumped him — because, she said, vaguely, she wanted to work on herself — I was struck by the inadvertent irony. That was the same bogus reason he used to break up with me! Wow, karma really is a bitch.
I knew I couldn’t be the only one whose ex had absentmindedly said something so perfectly clueless. So I asked around, and collected 10 actually-true things our exes have said to us. Click through for our most annoying ex quotes — and how we reacted to them — and please share yours in the comments!
1. “I still don’t understand why we broke up.”
2. “I think I want to be single for awhile”
3. “Feel like hanging out sometime?” aka “Will you sleep with me even though we broke up?”
4. “I really regret getting you put in jail. You are the girl I should have married.”
5. HIM: “She dumped me so she could work on herself.”
ME: “That’s the same reason you told me you wanted to break up with me.”
HIM: “Oh yeah! You’re right.”
6. “Where did you buy those super sexy knee high stockings that you used to wear for me? I want to buy a pair for the girl I’m dating.”
7. “You’re prettier and cooler, but she’s not as smart so it’s easier.”
8. “I’m worried I’ll meet someone else, but I really do care about you.”
9. “You’ll never meet anybody as great as me.”
10. “Sorry for being such an asshole.”
11. “I never should have broken up with you.”