In the dating world especially, first impressions are lasting ones. So it’s always rough when you thought you wooed a dude and he never calls you again. Sigh. Luckily, this week, one of our Frisky gentlemen clued us in to the 10 Reasons He Didn’t Ask You Out On A Second Date. Eye opening, am I right, ladies?! While cell phone shenanigans, a lack of physical attraction, talking too much about yourself, and blatant pre-date lies definitely apply to both genders, there are some specific reasons for why a gal won’t give a guy the time of day again. Here are some reasons why she isn’t going to come back for round two.
1. You’re Way Too Into Me: We’re all nervous about being liked on a first date, but it’s even worse when the dude is proposing before the bread basket has arrived. Too much too fast makes me want to put on the brakes. You have to give me the chance to get to know you before I’m willing to say you’re entitled to 50% of my bobble head collection.
2. You Got Too Drunk: Alcohol can help relax the initial first-date jitters. However, you shouldn’t get all Wiley McWasted. Slurring isn’t sexy.
3. You Got Grabby: This often goes hand in hand with #2, but before I let my guard down (aka get naked), I want to get the sense that you respect me. If you’re already pawing at my butt and we haven’t even kissed yet, I reserve the right to use my ninja moves on you. Try pinching me with a cast!
4. Bad Table Manners: A friend of mine once went out with a dude who dunked his finger in his drink and then sucked the liquid off. Um, YUCK! Needless to say, there was no date #2.
5. You Didn’t Offer To Buy My First Drink: As a working girl, I’m all for going Dutch. Dinner is one thing, but if you invite me to meet you at a bar and you don’t try to get me one drink, you’re a cheapskate. How can we get this romance started if you’re not even willing to ask me what I want from a simple bar menu?
6. You Twittered In My Presence: Everybody Twitters sometime, but Twittering while we’re on our first date? Can’t those 140 characters wait? Or am I boring you? Or are you writing that you’re having a bad time? That update just opened a Pandora’s Box of insecurities.
7. No Eye Contact: I can’t trust you if you can’t look me in the eyes. Even if it’s just from nerves, I don’t know if you’re anxious or a serial killer. Either way, you’re showing a serious lack of confidence.
8. You Make Lots Of Big Declarative Statements About What You’re Looking For: Sounds more like you just want someone who will nod along with your lectures. Don’t get me wrong, I want to know what kinds of things are important to you. But if it feels like you’re going down a checklist, I have to wonder, are you laying down the law or do you want to get to know me?
9. You Called Your Ex-Girlfriend “Crazy”: Sure, I might be scared you’d say the same thing about me. But I’m even more afraid that she truly is nutso and, by dating you, I’ll incur her vengeful wrath.
10. You Didn’t Bring Anything To The Conversation: I’m glad you like what I have to say, but what’s on your mind? We’re not at that comfortable silence stage at date #1.
11. Dress To Impress: That T-shirt has a stain on it. You don’t have to get all fake fancy, but on the first date shouldn’t you be trying to look your best? I didn’t blow-dry my hair because I thought I was going to meet a mess.
12. You Were Rude To The Waiter/Waitress: Whether you seemed one flirt away from slapping her ass or you complained about every detail of the meal, you should always be respectful. If you’re already abusing your relationship with a waiter/waitress, what hope is there for me?
13. I Remind You Of … : Your mom, your sister, your ex-girlfriend—AGH! Unless you are going to compare me to a babelicious celeb you don’t have any connection to (say, Zooey Deschanel, Bar Rafaeli, Marilyn Monroe), keep the comparisons to yourself.
Posted by: Simcha Whitehill