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Relationships

23 Guys I’ll Never Get The Chance To Bang

by The Frisky December 24, 2019
by The Frisky December 24, 2019 Source: glamour
1.1K

My whole dating strategy the past few years has been to act like a kid in a penny candy store. I’ve been bagging any man who looks tasty, just getting a couple bites, then moving on to the next flavor. They’ve all been sweet, but, frankly, I’m starting to get a toothache. Now that I’ve really seen what’s out there on the market, I’ve been able to narrow down the ones I have no chance of ever finding, wooing, or making it work with. Here’s who I’ve got so far…

1. Male model

2. Billionaire

3. Bounty hunter (I’m a good girl, I swear)

4. Stand-up comedian who is actually funny

5. Guy who uses all those little sauce packets that come with Chinese take-out so I don’t have to feel guilty about always throwing them out

6. An explorer

Source: cougardatesites

7. Sexy snowboarder named Shaun White

8. Actually, any pro athlete for that matter

9. Newspaper man

10. Magician whose appeal isn’t an illusion

11. Lumberjack—and not just a guy with a beard and a plaid shirt

12. Dancer

13. Surfer

14. Fancy shoe maker

15. Juicehead guido who wouldn’t fist-bump at our wedding

Source: pinterest

16. Dude who does not like to do it with the light on

17. Reality show “winner”

18. Astronaut Mike Dexter

19. Rock star who doesn’t cheat

20. Bartender, whilst he’s sober

21. Plastic surgeon

22. Politician (I’ve got some photos on the internet that explain why … )

Source: Proženy

23. Man who does not want to have anal sex

Original by: Simcha Whitehill

datingdating adviceGuy Typeslist
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