If you’re one of those girls who has a host of men in her life, but no one to bring to a wedding, you can’t remember the last time you had sex and it didn’t qualify as a “friends with benefits” situation, and you always end up being some sort of dating coach to the guys you’re really into, it’s time to get yourself out of the Friend Zone and into more datable territory. After the jump, seven ways to avoid the Friend Zone.
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1. Quit dating guys who are on the rebound
Guys on the rebound aren’t looking for relationships, they’re looking for flings and fast hook-ups. And you know what happens to flings once the chemistry fizzles? They get the ol’ “I think we should just be friends” talk. So save yourself the time and trauma and skip the rebound guy, no matter how hot he is.
2. Don’t be too available
Guys like challenges and they’re most intrigued by women who have active lives, so keep things interesting by only accepting half his invites to hang out. Tell him you have other plans, but be vague about what they are. At this point, vague is sexy, vague is challenging, vague is something he wants to figure out.
3. If he seems out of your league, don’t waste your time
Not necessarily because he IS out of your league, but because if you think he is, you’ll treat him like someone you don’t deserve, and that’s so not sexy.
4. Don’t talk about past relationships
Wanna know the fastest way to make a guy your friend? Treat him like your therapist and whine about all the ways your past boyfriends hurt you. Making yourself the scorned victim doesn’t exactly scream ‘sensuality’…or, you know, ‘awesome mental health’. What it does do, though, is make you not worth the hassle, no matter how hot you are.
5. Don’t over-compliment
If he’s got great hair, a hot bod, sexy lips, a cute accent, and a wicked sense of style, chances are he already knows he does. You know why? Because every other girl who wanted to bang him told him a 100 different ways already. So set yourself apart from those other yahoos and keep your compliments to yourself for now. Once he falls madly in love with you there will be plenty of time to tell him how much you like his dimples.
6. Keep dates romantic
Guitar Hero and pizza delivery is not a date, it’s a night with your sister and brother-in-law and all their married friends. If you aren’t exclusive yet and still in danger of landing in the Friend Zone, only go on dates that would be awkward to have with your brother.
7. Get physical, but not too physical
There’s a fine line between being sexually assertive and completely aggressive. The former is confident, sexy, intriguing, and definitely more than a friend. The latter can easily seem lonely, insecure, needy, and like one of the Bachelorettes who cries in the limo when she doesn’t’ receive a rose. If you were a guy which one would you want to keep around?
Original by: Wendy Atterberry