• About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Latest
  • Terms and Conditions
  • Privacy Policy
The Frisky
  • Home
  • News
  • Health
  • Celebs
  • Movies
  • Love
  • Relationships
  • Style
  • Entertainment
  • Parenting
  • Royals
  • Travel
Entertainment

If You Need A Pussy Snorkel, You Might Be Doing Oral Sex Wrong

by Billy Antonio August 10, 2018
by Billy Antonio August 10, 2018
5.5K

You really can buy anything on Amazon these days, even a pussy snorkel. And not just any pussy snorkel, but one that glows in the dark for those more intimate moments. Everyone take a break to spit out their coffee. The product is designed to allow a “man to continue breathing while performing oral sex on a woman in a spa, bathtub or even a bowl of green Jell-O.” However, if you need a pussy snorkel, you might be doing it wrong.

Let’s just forget about the fact that women might want to go down on their lady too and focus on the fact that since this product doesn’t seem to be a joke, going down on a woman in a bowl of green Jell-O is a) something someone (I’m just going to go ahead and say a man) has thought of doing and b) would be really, really sticky. At that point, I feel like breathing is the least of your problems.

Once UPS drops off your package, you can tear right into it, “insert the breathing apparatus into your nostrils, rub the clitoral stimulator against your favorite coral reef and start with the tongue action,” the product description reads. Your favorite coral reef. This is where we are, people. As of right now, the product is “currently unavailable” for purchase and there’s no list price for the headgear. Please let that not be because it’s sold out.

The person that invents a snorkel so you can breathe while eating pussy will become a millionaire

— Glohannes (@j0hax) May 17, 2016

Pussy so wet he gonna need a goddamn snorkel

— Bill (@Brunner11Blake) May 23, 2016

Apparently though, there is also demand for a “pussy snorkel” even if you aren’t in the bowl of green Jell-O you keep in the backyard. Some social media users have been clamoring for this product just for regular, old-fashioned oral action.

Now, I don’t go down on many women, so I can’t attest to this desire for a little extra air in bed, but it seems to me that the breathing technique for cunnilingus is most likely very similar to giving a blowjob. While giving head to anyone, much like in everyday life, it’s best not to be a mouth-breather. In any case, it doesn’t appear that women have this same issue with oral sex.

As a gay lady I’m gonna go ahead and say this is unnecessary: https://t.co/vI24pcK7H8

— Amber (@thebetchdeltest) June 3, 2016

There are actual reviews for the product dating back to 2009, one even written by a “verified” purchaser. Another jokester wrote a review detailing her experience with the product and her family cat (Get it? Pussy?), which is actually the first thing that crossed my mind when I saw the name of the product. “Don’t cats hate water?,” I tsk-ed, shaking my judgmental little head.

Maybe my sex life needs a little spicing up because, quite frankly, while my vibrator is in fact water proof, I’ve never even considered it. Let’s just chalk this up to the fact that any kind of sex in water is super overrated.

Shower sex is more work than it’s worth (sometimes…), it can get really cold in pools and bodies of natural water, and bathtubs, Jell-O filled or not, just seem dangerous. In my humble, and not at all prude opinion, if you need a snorkel and a head lamp (this thing doesn’t have a head lamp, but it totally should), I think you’re doing it wrong.

Original by Karen Fratti @karenfratti

cunnilinguspussy snorkel
Billy Antonio

previous post
6 Additional Scientology Horror Stories We’d Like To See Covered In A “Going Clear” Sequel
next post
Girl Talk: I’m Just Not That Into Anyone Anymore

Related Posts

A Handy Dandy Guide To Troubleshooting Bad Sex

March 8, 2020

On Sad Ass Dudes Who Publish Serious Op-Eds...

October 22, 2019

Why Is “Going Down” Often A One-Way Street?

October 5, 2019

Categories

  • Accessories
  • Animals
  • Anime
  • Art
  • Astrology
  • Beard Care
  • Beauty
  • Betting
  • Biography
  • Blog
  • Business
  • Buying Guides
  • Cannabis
  • Cars
  • Casino
  • CBD
  • Celebs
  • Children
  • Citizenship
  • Clippers
  • Clothes
  • Computer
  • Couple Time
  • COVID-19
  • Crime
  • Crypto
  • Culture
  • Design
  • DIY
  • Economics
  • Education
  • Entertainment
  • Environment
  • Family
  • Fashion
  • Featured
  • Food
  • Food & Drink
  • Furniture
  • Galleries
  • Gambling
  • Games
  • Gardening
  • Gifts
  • Girl
  • Gossip
  • Guide
  • Guys
  • Hair
  • Hair Care Tips
  • Hair Dryers
  • Hair loss
  • Hairstyles
  • Health
  • Highlights
  • History
  • Hobby
  • Home
  • Horoscopes
  • Hot Rollers
  • How to …
  • Industry
  • Internet
  • Interview
  • Law
  • Legal Advice
  • Life
  • Lifestyle
  • Love & Sex
  • Love Your Self
  • Makeup
  • Marketing
  • Medicine
  • Mind & Body
  • Money
  • Motorcycle
  • Movies
  • Moving
  • Music
  • Nails
  • Net Worth
  • News
  • Parenting
  • People
  • Pets
  • Photography
  • Products for Hair
  • Real Estate
  • Recipes
  • Relationships
  • Religion
  • Royals
  • SEO
  • Shopping
  • Skincare
  • Sports
  • Studying
  • Style
  • Super Stars
  • Tech
  • Technology
  • The Body
  • Tips
  • Tips & Tricks
  • Tools
  • Toys
  • Travel
  • Type
  • Uncategorized
  • Vape
  • Vehicle
  • Video
  • VR
  • Wedding
Footer Logo
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Latest
  • Terms and Conditions
  • Privacy Policy

© 2024 - All Right Reserved.

TheFrisky.com is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com. Amazon, the Amazon logo, AmazonSupply, and the AmazonSupply logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.

We at TheFrisky participate in various affiliate marketing programs, which means we may earn commissions on products or services that we recommend or promote through our website. When you click on a link to purchase a product or service that we have recommended or promoted, we may earn a commission from the sale. This commission helps us maintain and improve our website and provide you with valuable information and resources.

The Frisky
  • Home
  • News
  • Health
  • Celebs
  • Movies
  • Love
  • Relationships
  • Style
  • Entertainment
  • Parenting
  • Royals
  • Travel
The Frisky
  • Home
  • News
  • Health
  • Celebs
  • Movies
  • Love
  • Relationships
  • Style
  • Entertainment
  • Parenting
  • Royals
  • Travel
© 2024 - All Right Reserved.

TheFrisky.com is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com. Amazon, the Amazon logo, AmazonSupply, and the AmazonSupply logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.

We at TheFrisky participate in various affiliate marketing programs, which means we may earn commissions on products or services that we recommend or promote through our website. When you click on a link to purchase a product or service that we have recommended or promoted, we may earn a commission from the sale. This commission helps us maintain and improve our website and provide you with valuable information and resources.
We use cookies to ensure that we give you the best experience on our website. If you continue to use this site we will assume that you are happy with it.OkNoPrivacy policy

Terms and Conditions - Privacy Policy