The Frisky
  • Home
  • News
  • Health
  • Celebs
  • Movies
  • Love
  • Relationships
  • Style
  • Entertainment
  • Parenting
  • Royals
  • Travel
  • About Us
  • Latest
  • Contact Us
The Frisky
  • Home
  • News
  • Health
  • Celebs
  • Movies
  • Love
  • Relationships
  • Style
  • Entertainment
  • Parenting
  • Royals
  • Travel
GuysStyle

Toward A Unified Theory Of Man Buns And Fuckability

by The Frisky September 27, 2019
by The Frisky September 27, 2019

Hey, guys. I hope you’re having a lovely Friday. We’ve got to have a little chat about something. There’s no nice way to say this: We need to talk to you about your man bun. Have you considered that the quality of your man bun is perhaps impacting your fuckability? We think you should.

Long hair on a man is, in theory, perfectly fine. Consider the once flowing locks of Jared Leto, ombréd to perfection, tousled, shiny, soft. It looked like it smelled of really expensive shampoo and wood smoke. It is hair that inspires Pinterest boards and shared photo streams, hair that is brandished in iPhone pictures and shown to stylists. “Make me look like this!” you scream. “This is what I want my hair to look like.”

Source: Bustle

Why does this man bun work? Because it’s lush. There’s some heft to it. If you grabbed it in passion or just out of a passing curiosity to see if it’s as soft as it looks, you’d get a real handful. This is how a man bun should be: vibrant, lustrous, long. Full of life. It should give you a hint of ’70s-Laurel-Canyon-cult-leader. You should be simultaneously attracted and intrigued. This is a solid man bun. It’s the gold standard.

Where Leto excels, so many other men fall short. Take into consideration someone on the other end of the spectrum, Leonardo DiCaprio. This is a valiant effort but sadly falls short. There’s no depth to this bun. There’s no oomph. It’s the bun of a man trying to desperately stop the march of time on his hairline. If the front of your hair is beating a hasty retreat towards the back, please do us a favor and accept nature’s course for you. There is nothing remotely sexy about a man bun that is really more of a man-nubbin.

Source: Pinterest

It’s silly to assess a man’s virility by the length of his hair, but there’s something about Jared Leto’s man bun that telegraphs high-quality, tender fucking. He’d be awake the whole entire time while you were doing it. He’d be sensitive. He’d pull your hair if you asked for it but would probably tend towards a Bon Iver-ish sensitivity. There would be cooing, and whispered nothings. It would be beautiful.

The boning you’d endure with the Leo of this equation would pale in comparison. The male that sports the man-nubbin would ask you for a halftime hand job during football season. He wouldn’t offer a quickie. You’d end up with a sticky wrist and a mounting irritation. This is not what anyone wants.

We implore you, men: if you’re going to go down this route, resist the urge to sweep up the scant strands you have into a struggle-bun. Use a headband. Invest in a product. Figure out a way to work through this awkward transition phase. If countless women growing out pixie cuts can make it through without looking like a hot mess, you can too.

Original by Megan Reynolds

dude stufffuckabilityhairman bunsunified theories
The Frisky

previous post
5 Advantages You Get From Studying Online
next post
Could Chocolate Be The Answer To Your Sunburnt Skincare Woes?

Related Posts

16 Best Color 350 Braiding Hair – Find...

August 4, 2022

8 Cute Hairstyles for a Beach Day

July 12, 2022

9 Ways to Promote Healthy Hair Growth

June 30, 2022

Recent Posts

  • 4 Important Considerations For Updating Your Wardrobe in Spring 2022

    August 12, 2022
  • How Do You Get Natural Light Into a Room Without a Window?

    August 12, 2022
  • How Long Does It Take to Get Good at Gta 5?

    August 12, 2022
  • All You Need To Know About Actuated Butterfly Valves And Their Application In Piping Systems

    August 12, 2022
  • 6 Gifts For The Demon Slayer Fan In Your Life 2022

    August 12, 2022
  • Dos and Do’Ts of Buying Contraceptive Pills Online

    August 12, 2022
  • Turkey — The Holiday Hub

    August 12, 2022
  • How Do You Clean Gunk Between Tiles?

    August 12, 2022

Categories

  • Accessories
  • Animals
  • Anime
  • Art
  • Astrology
  • Beard Care
  • Beauty
  • Betting
  • Biography
  • Business
  • Buying Guides
  • Cannabis
  • Cars
  • Casino
  • CBD
  • Celebs
  • Children
  • Chlotes
  • Clippers
  • Couple Time
  • COVID-19
  • Crypto
  • Culture
  • Design
  • DIY
  • Economics
  • Education
  • Entertainment
  • Environment
  • Family
  • Fashion
  • Featured
  • Food
  • Food & Drink
  • Furniture
  • Galleries
  • Gambling
  • Games
  • Gardening
  • Gifts
  • Girl
  • Gossip
  • Guide
  • Guys
  • Hair
  • Hair Care Tips
  • Hair Dryers
  • Hair loss
  • Hairstyles
  • Health
  • Highlights
  • History
  • Hobby
  • Home
  • Horoscopes
  • Hot Rollers
  • How to …
  • Industry
  • Interview
  • Law
  • Legal Advice
  • Lifestyle
  • Love & Sex
  • Love Your Self
  • Makeup
  • Marketing
  • Mind & Body
  • Money
  • Motorcycle
  • Movies
  • Moving
  • Music
  • Net Worth
  • News
  • Parenting
  • People
  • Pets
  • Photography
  • Products for Hair
  • Recipes
  • Relationships
  • Religion
  • Royals
  • SEO
  • Shopping
  • Skincare
  • Sports
  • Studyng
  • Style
  • Super Stars
  • Tech
  • Technology
  • The Body
  • Tips
  • Tips & Tricks
  • Tools
  • Toys
  • Travel
  • Uncategorized
  • Vehicle
  • Video
  • VR
  • Wedding

Contact us:

santosmilewa [at] demotix.com

Footer Logo
  • About Us
  • Latest
  • Contact Us

© 2022 - All Right Reserved.

TheFrisky.com is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com. Amazon, the Amazon logo, AmazonSupply, and the AmazonSupply logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.

The Frisky
  • Home
  • News
  • Health
  • Celebs
  • Movies
  • Love
  • Relationships
  • Style
  • Entertainment
  • Parenting
  • Royals
  • Travel
© 2022 - All Right Reserved.

TheFrisky.com is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com. Amazon, the Amazon logo, AmazonSupply, and the AmazonSupply logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates.