Relationships are at the very heart of the important things we do in our lives. When we form relationships with other people, we are forging partnerships. It’s how we, as humans, contribute to society and further ourselves in life.
Unfortunately, relationships don’t always stay rosy. They have their ups and downs. But what if you feel your relationship with someone has more downs than ups? How can you spot the warning signs that things are going sour between you both?
Dishonesty
Arguably, dishonest is the number one warning sign that a relationship is failing. When one person often lies to the other about anything, it shows morality issues are present.
The occasional white lie is forgivable. After all, everyone has told at least one such lie in their lives! But, if someone spends more time lying than telling the truth, there is something seriously wrong.
Being defensive
Let’s face it: no-one likes to get challenged in a relationship. It makes the other person feel like they’re getting accused of wrongdoing.
But, here’s the thing: if you feel like you always have to challenge your partner, it can be a warning sign. Often, one partner may challenge the other regularly if they feel that deceit and infidelity are present.
As you can appreciate, being defensive isn’t particularly useful for open communication. All it does is put up a wall between the two of you.
Lack of respect
One of the foundations of any successful relationship is mutual respect. If one partner feels the other is disrespecting them, it can put the whole relationship in jeopardy.
Disrespect can stem from all kinds of reasons. If the two people in question want to stay true to each other, they need to discuss those reasons. As strange as it sounds, sometimes disrespect is a side-effect of feeling vulnerable. Or it is even being scared of completely trusting someone due to past breakdowns.
Of course, disrespect can also be down to immaturity. Whatever the reason, it’s worth talking things through to find out what the cause of that disrespect is.
Contempt
Last but by no means least, one significant warning sign of impending doom is contempt. When two people are in a relationship, it goes without saying that they should value each other. If there are clear signs of contempt in a relationship, the chances of survival are often slim.
If one partner has feelings of contempt for the other, the cause may be down to childhood abuse. Of course, the reason for any contempt may stem from parental relationships.
For example, if a male parent shows contempt to all females (including their spouse), the male son may consider that as normal behavior. Obviously, having contempt for anyone in a relationship is anything but normal!
What to do next
If you fear that any of those warning signs are present in your relationship, what should you do? In those situations, it makes sense to communicate with your partner. Try to find out why there is a problem, and get them to help you understand it.
Should that fail, it’s best to consider having a couple’s therapy with a licensed professional counselor like www.isaiahcounselingandwellness.com. Sometimes, having a third party involved in a relationship problem can help a couple focus on what’s wrong.