Divorce is always a tragedy and pain. The purpose of this article is to help women understand and survive the situation. Of course, the severity of psychological trauma strongly depends on the reason for which the divorce occurred.
If there are no children in the marriage, this bitter event is transferred easier and calmer.
Divorce involves a lot of intense stress and emotional distress. Even if this event occurred by mutual consent of the spouses, then there will be a sense of loss and inner emptiness. However, not everything is so sad, because life after a divorce does not end, but only moves to a new stage. Time will pass, and the person will feel himself free, but not divorced.
Life after the divorce
When the marriage union is officially ended, then divorced people are left alone with their own emotions and try to figure out how to start life after a divorce. They have a feeling of loneliness, fatigue, and weakness. However, these experiences go away after a while, and the person manages to realize that the time has come to move on.
Women and men behave in entirely different ways after the destruction of relationships. If the marriage union has left the spouse, then the peculiarity of the man is that he can be carried away for some period by alcohol and promiscuous sexual connections. He no longer wants to remarry, as he has a lot of doubts about the opposite sex. Women, first of all, feel self-pity, feel inferior and feel guilty.
First, the fair sex is likely to begin to eat a lot of sweets, and then will be on a long diet. Also, women often turn to a psychologist with the words: “I cannot establish a personal life. What to do?”
According to DivorceFiller, to prevent the unpleasant consequences of breaking a marriage, you should adhere to the following recommendations on how to start living after divorce from your husband:
- Try to appreciate yourself, no need to make attempts to regain your other half, degrading your dignity. No need to blame yourself, just let go of the past, because it will not return.
- Do not get carried away with alcoholic drinks and chaotic relationships. Wait a little time, do not give up on courtship from the opposite sex, but do not rush to enter into a new relationship immediately.
- Learn to enjoy loneliness. Try to think positively; focus on the future. Try to include fun music, do the cleaning and exercise.
- If you find it challenging to contain emotions, then try using the services of a psychologist and change your behavior.
- It is necessary to clearly understand that the most joyful moments are waiting for you ahead.
- You should also accept that the past does not return, so stop clinging to it and live in the present time. Treat negative experiences as a kind of life lesson that made you more intelligent and stronger.
Divorce and women
Breaking up with a tyrant spouse is salvation. After spending years under firm male control and, having said goodbye to him, the woman feels light and free. New life will be filled with joyful moments, and regret will be only that the divorce did not work out before.
The same can be said about the situation after a divorce from a drunkard, who could not only drink up his salary but also often beat his wife. Past problems, worries, and fears will completely disappear along with the former alcoholic spouse.
As LegalZoom claims, new life can begin at any time, regardless of age. With a divorce of 40 years or more, when the children are already adults, the woman may have time for herself. If she likes to care for her grandchildren, then she has an excellent opportunity to escape from sad thoughts and feel important and necessary. And walking with children in the park, you can meet an interesting and lonely man who can become a faithful companion until the end of life.
Recommendations of specialists
If the husband left you for the sake of another woman, then you can cope with stress and anxiety with the help of girlfriends. Psychologists, in turn, make the following recommendations:
- Mourn well, but alone. Let the others see a strong and confident woman. You can cry the accumulated emotions at home, and it will significantly ease the suffering. The most important thing is not to delay crying and not to overdo it with regrets.
- Understand yourself. After the divorce, almost all women feel despair, loss and some emptiness. Communicating with family and friends will help soberly assess the situation.
- Take care of your appearance. Spend more time with your hobbies and exciting activities. Now you have a lot of free time, love yourself, and you will notice how everything around will sparkle with other colors.
- Change the style, dye your hair in a different shade. Recreate yourself.
- Do not stay alone. There is no need to grieve while lying on the bed. You are waiting for exciting acquaintances and meetings. Of course, friends do not always have time to communicate with you. However, there are lots of public places where you can meet and have a good time.
- Learn to dream again
- If before that the burden of the family budget lay on your husband, now you must take care of your material well-being. Pleasant fatigue and new communication will help you.
How divorce affects a man
If ladies prefer to share emotions with their girlfriends, then ex-husbands accumulate feelings within themselves. Without expressing insults, they do not give way to mental pain, which is reflected in physical and psychological health. Fears and negative thoughts can even lead to suicidal thoughts.
Women need a year or two of regular life to get used to new conditions. A man can immediately marry another woman, thus filling the inner void. They may also try to drown out the pain in an alcoholic and riotous lifestyle. They lose all interest in the work.
There are three particular types of divorced men:
- Militant. Such a representative of the stronger sex makes repeated attempts to harm the former wife. Often he warns about this even during the process of divorce. He only cannot accept the fact that his wife will now become independent and will not communicate with him. In this case, absolutely everyone suffers children, wife, and, of course, husband.
- Detached and indifferent. Such men straightforwardly accept divorce because they do it on their initiative. They understand their guilt because they never enter into conflicts. In case of the presence of typical children, they will try to remain friends with their former wife.
- Haggard. At the very beginning of the divorce process, they suddenly realize that they do not see life without their spouse. Therefore, such men try to restore relationships, but not everyone succeeds in this.
New life after divorce is possible. It is necessary to look at things optimistically and not to doubt that happiness is not far off.