Many people have never heard of oneitis in their lives before but many men have surely have been having it in their lives. When we try to define it, we can say that it is a condition when a single woman is an obsession to a guy in his life. This can mean that this woman can be someone you are already dating, a woman you married, work with, or even someone that you have seen for the first time in your life. The problem is how to get over this condition and how to work on masculine development. For more information on this check masculinedevelopment.
What it is and when it happens?
It should be noted that oneitis is a condition when a man becomes desperate and is in the constant need of the approval of one woman that he longs for. The condition may get so severe in terms that a man may not even be able to sleep and eat without that particular woman. Many people ask how this can even happen, and there are multiple reasons for this. The ultimate description here is that a particular man thinks of a woman as a solution to all the problems that he has and a solution to his happiness. This practically means that he puts a certain on a pedestal regardless if that woman really deserves it or not.
Oneitis vs. Love
Many men try to define oneitis as a kind of love but is should be clearly stated that these two conditions are actually very different. How? First of all, oneitis is a kind of obsession when a particular woman is idealized even if a man does not know her very well. On the other hand love is when you meet someone, get to know that person well, when you are aware of her, or his, flaws but you accept them as a part of that person. When love is defined as a free choice of kindness and patience, oneitis is quite the opposite since a man has the feeling of codependency and neediness. While love gives strength to people to do things oneitis does quite the opposite since a man then becomes weak.
How to overcome oneitis?
1. It should be noted that one of the best things to be done when having this condition is to try to develop a healthy way of thinking and healthy beliefs. One of the best things to be done here, even though it sounds a bit ridiculous, is to believe that life is not so generous and that it would give the little it can and that you should be able to recognize it. You need to be aware that there are a lot of women and that many of them would be equally good for you.
2. Since we are all humans it is normal that we have past experiences that may have been hurtful and that may have caused some trauma that is holding us back or is limiting our lives. We should be self-conscious to discover this trauma and to let it go.
3. Many people simple do not know how to appreciate themselves and how worthy they are. The most important thing in life is to know how valuable you are and to love yourself. This would actually create self-confidence and you would have the need to have another person that would fill the hole in your life.
4. It is also very important for a man to have confidence and to be good with women. If you are lacking self-esteem and if you do not know how to talk, attract and seduce women, you would have a problem with oneitis. It is important to develop you game and to be comfortable around any kind of women and to show charisma and flirting in those situations.
5. It should be also noted that people who have oneitis have monotonous and boring lives. It is of the utmost importance to have an interesting life or to build one since you would not need a woman in this case who would be the pillar of your existence.
6. It is also very important to create a kind of an emotional ecosystem. This means that you should also work on all kinds of relationships in your lives, i.e. bonding with other men.