A break is when a couple/partnership feels the need to try a trial separation, of sorts. There’s no shame in it, and while it’s a major crossroads for a twosome, it’s not the end, not yet at least. Two of the most important ways to survive the break is to establish what the rules of the break will be (before you ACTUALLY take the break), and to respect those rules. This makes us ask: what are the rules?
FINE PRINT: Each relationship is unique, and the healthy rules for one may bring hell to another. Take these as suggestions, not gospel.
1. Sex
Source: medium
Yeah, baby. You have to figure out whether or not you can sleep with other people. That’s first. Then the decisions become a little more technical: what about a drunken hook up? Can you go on a date but have to keep the sheets unruffled? Is it okay just to hook up casually but you can’t explore it as anything more? Do you two want to make a schedule for once a week, or once a month where you still arrange to get jiggy with each other? Sex is a pillar you need to make sure is set in the foundation of the break very well before breaking contact with one another. Personally, I’d recommend a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. No relationship allowed but give your partner freedom to live their lives and let situations evolve. If you make the shackles too tight from the start then you’re not going to give enough freedom to figure out if you want to stay or go.
2. Why are you taking the break?
Source: Talkspace
Big question. You have to come up with an answer that you both agree with. You’ve got to be reading from the same book and on the same page. Are you taking the break because you want figure out whether it’s good to be dating exclusively? About moving in together? Maybe you want to go off to work on your own issues apart from the relationship? Whatever the reason(s), make sure you’re both crystal clear on the why.
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