Here’s a poorly kept secret: Men are also from Venus. That’s what I’ve learned after six years of writing for The New York Times wedding section—also known as the Ladies’ Sports Pages. Sure, a few thousand years’ history of raping and pillaging suggests otherwise, but beneath the stubble and the Sportscenter addiction, most men are as confused, vulnerable and […]
Maybe you catch him standing at the other end of the bar, slyly checking you out. Maybe you met him before and flirted with him, but he never asked for your phone number. Or, maybe you’ve already hung out with him a few times, but a casual arm flung over your shoulders is about the […]
Do you know how, on job applications, they always ask if you’ve ever been arrested? And then they invariably follow it up with, “If yes, please explain?” Do you ever get the feeling that if you write “yes” on the first blank, there is absolutely nothing you can write on the second that will save […]
I don’t think I have a small penis. I mean, I’ve stared at it all of my life. I can wrap my fingers around it, so I know it’s not of Sasquatch proportions. There are inches there, multiple inches, of love. I’d say it would make a nice cigar. I have been given the standard […]
Not so long ago, my wife and I were talking to a recently-divorced friend of ours. She’s younger than we are, in her early thirties, and as far as she’s concerned, she’s never tying the knot again. Not because of an objection to the institution, but because she’s convinced that most men marry for one […]
At some point, you’ve probably fallen for a guy who just isn’t in the “right place” when you meet him. Maybe it’s obvious from his inability to communicate his feelings. Or, maybe he just flat-out tells you that he’s not ready to be in a relationship. Do you wait for him? Do you tell yourself […]
There was nothing wrong with her. She was not to blame. She was the apotheosis of lust, comprising every element of cisgendered sex from the grrrl-next-door to the bust-down. I wanted her. I needed her. It’s just that this time — this one time — I couldn’t orgasm. Yes, I loved sex, and yes, I loved […]
Like countless American children, I grew up hearing the nursery rhyme that claimed that little boys were made of “snips and snails and puppy-dog tails” while girls were “sugar and spice and everything nice.” Attached as I was as a small boy to our pet dachshund, I thought puppy-dog tails were a fine thing indeed, […]
For the past few years now, I’ve had a sporadic conversation with a close friend (I’ll call her “Jenna”) about her admitted weakness for a certain type of guy. The problem, in her own words, is that she falls for Prince Charmings who end up transforming into toads. Recently, we turned to the topic of […]
