The other day, Wendy asked you, our readers, to share the worst pick-up lines that you’ve ever heard. And, ladies, you’ve heard some real doozies! Check out our favorites after the jump.
1. “Is your boyfriend sitting here?” (He sits down.) “Now he is.”
2. “Hey, I bet nobody’s ever picked you up like this before.” (Tosses condom onto table.)
3. (Instant message on a dating site.) “I’d like to participate in nude wrestling with you, followed by a happy ending.”
4. “A guy friend asked me, ‘So are you single now?’ and when I told him yes, his response was, ‘Good, want to bone?’”
5. “Can I have your phone number? I’m going into the hospital for a few weeks, and I’d really like someone to talk to.”
6. “Hey, baby, wanna ride my escalator?”
7. “If I were a squirrel and you were a squirrel, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?”
8. “Can I push your stool in?”
9. “Can I wear your thighs for ear muffs?”
10. “So, girls with big lips are usually pretty good at something … Are you?”
11. “Guy: ‘Do you have any Italian in you?’ Me: ‘Nooo.’ Guy: ‘Want some?’”
12. “The doctor said my mono has finally cleared up. Want to make out?”
13. “You look like a smurf, a hot smurf.”
14. “Hey, I hear your ankles are having a party. You want to invite your pants down?”
15. “If you jingle my bells, I’ll promise you a white Christmas.”
16. “Oh, so you’re American? I would never have guessed. You’re quite the cunning linguist.”
17. “Save water. Shower with me.”
18. “My hands are freezing cold! Can I warm them on your breasts?”
19. “Hey, hey, did it hurt? Huh? Well, did it hurt? When you fell from heaven?”
20. “I have an 11-inch penis.”
Original by Susannah Breslin
