Breakups are hard. And personally, I’m not a fan. I hate dealing with heartbreak and pain—which is one of the reasons I’ve been single for the past few years. It’s not like I’m looking forward to breaking up with someone new, but I don’t want to chance the possibility. And don’t even get me started in the sex. I’m not the casual sex type, so jumping from bed to bed isn’t my thing. But these days, it’s all about hook-ups.
We live in a society where relationships are minute and guys are rarely courting women. It’s become a widespread phenomenon. From teens to adult, everyone is hooking up left and right. And with the help of apps like Tinder and Soulswipe, hooking up has never been easier. With a swipe of a finger, you can get a casual bae within seconds. Uh, no thank you.
Most people depend on casual sex because they fear potential heartbreak. However, there are some women who are still looking for sex and love. If you’re getting into a new relationship but the fear of taking that extra step is real, here are four things to consider:
Think
Before embarking on a sexual journey with a new partner, you may wanna think long and hard about it. It’s easy for a woman to see an attractive man and be instantly turned on by him. The next thing you know, you’re in his bed, getting it on.
But what if he doesn’t call the next day? Or the next day after that? Ain’t nobody got time for heartbreak and regret. So, if you know you won’t be okay with not developing a relationship after sex, don’t do it. Otherwise, do your thing girl.
Communicate
One of the main reasons feelings get lost in translation is lack of communication; Another reason is honesty. Communicate your feelings to new bae. If you know you’ll freak out if he ghosts you after sex, tell him. If you’re going to want more than a one-night stand, tell him.
Be honest with yourself and your dude—talk about it. Tell him your intentions and see if his are the same. Then go from there. Remember: Honesty and communication are the best policies. Practice them.
Ease Into It
You don’t have to rush into a new sexual relationship; Take your time. No one’s trying to run to the finish line. And if he is, he’s not the guy for you. A guy who is really for you will be willing to respect your wishes and the pace you want to take.
Go For It
If you and new bae have made the decision to go forward and get it on, do it! Just make sure you go at a pace that feels comfortable for the both of you. No need to rush. Also, protect yourselves. This is most important. Get tested together and rack up on condoms. Safe sex is the best sex, so wear a latex!
