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Shameful and Hilarious
As long as everything is consensual, there should be no shame or embarrassment in sexual activities… unless you’re a teenager whose mom walked in on you while you were touching yourself. That would make dinner a little awkward.
These Redditors anonymously shared their least favorite moments experienced during getting it on. These are more than just “I came in less than ten seconds” kind of tales. As you’ll see, people often have very secret bedroom lives.
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Family Time
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I had a sex dream. In the car. With my whole family in it. Woke up after dreaming about moaning and the whole car was dead silent. Ugh. Still makes me cringe (lizzardx)
All the Sperms
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Every single time I cum from PIV sex, the only reason I cum is because I fantasize that the dude is about to cum in me against my will. I have a breeding fetish, apparently, but don’t actually want to get pregnant, so they always pull out. But something about the risk just opens up the flood gates.
I’m never actually comfortable with anyone to like do what you do and scream it out. Maybe one day.
FFS, yes, I realize this is a primitive, natural desire. However, some people do find this weird. You may not be one of those people, and you’re great! But, with a lot of people it’s not something you just jump right into doing right away (unprotected sex and doing the full-on “fetish talk”). It requires a conversation, before you just start screaming at your boyfriend of two months to “cum in me and get me pregnant.”
Additionally, I haven’t been with very many people. The last two people I was with, I was on a birth control hiatus. That’s why they pulled out. I am now on birth control, thanks. (Beachinbeauty)
Small Eggs
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I have small testicles. When I get an erection, they are almost non-existant. (Rocadinis)
Smaller potatoes make the meat look bigger. (racer_24_4evr)
Tell me what brand!
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My vibrator has lasted longer than my longest relationship. (jenesaipas)
Fits like a glove
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My freshman year of high school I was too embarrassed to go to the store and buy condoms, so I tried using one of those disposable latex gloves that doctors use. Needless to say, it didn’t work and I was left standing embarrassed in the drama room bathroom with a doctor’s glove tied around my d–k and a girlfriend that could not have been more turned off.
She laughed at me and told most of her friends. I broke up with her soon after.
Just to clarify, I was raised in a very religious household that had a lot of holdups when it came to sex. I know now that there is nothing shameful with buying condoms. I grabbed the gloves off of a shelf in the drama room as a desperate last minute attempt at finding some protections. Hormones are a hell of a drug.
Also, I broke up with my, now ex, girlfriend because she was abusive and made me feel like shit almost all of the time. This incident was just the straw that broke the camel’s back. (InvincibleJeff)
You do what you gotta do
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I used to cross dress and provided escort services for 3 years to pay for my out of state college tuition and rent. Got my degree in finance and no debt. (buclaoboii)
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Original by Chewy Boese
