Try it out!
Not many people I know practice tantra. Alright, no one I know has told me that they do it. Personally, I’ve shied away from it because it seemed like I would need to read a lot of boring books, go to yoga, meditate, and a lot of other preparation I am too lazy for. And that’s not even mentioning that going at it for hours sounds like vaginal chaffing and a UTI waiting to happen.
But a basic intro level tantra can be incorporated into your next sexual encounter and there are many ways to go about it. Yes, it does involve mind and body connection, but you don’t have to be a guru to reap the rewards. All you need is a partner you are deeply connected to.
“The general definition of tantra is to weave, to unify, and to mesh,” says Devika Singh, a tantric sex and relationship coach. Not only do you have to do this physically, but emotionally as well. You both need to be all-in to maximize the pleasure you give and receive.
What am I rambling on about? COMMUNICATION. You can’t have the awesomest sex without talking to your partner before, during, and after sex. If something isn’t working, speak up! A good lover will be understanding and accommodating.
Alright. Here it comes. The yoga and meditation I was bitching about.
Tantra is a spiritual practice, not a means to an end. Get in touch with your own energies and learn how to control your breathing for optimal relaxation and health. If you don’t want to take a yoga class, they are available online so you can do them in the privacy of your home. I highly suggest taking advantage of introductory specials most yoga studios have so you know you are doing the poses correctly.
The other option — — is easy and free! Check out this guide to Meditation 101.
Before starting any sexy stuff, both parties should take several deep breaths (in and out the nose). This will help you relax immediately and get you into the right mindset of giving and receiving different levels of pleasure.
Yes, you can work on tantric sex while masturbating!
“When you’re single, that’s a great time to work on [breathing, awareness of your desires, and being present], and become sexually explorative of yourself,” Singh says.
Going at it alone will translate to when you have partnered sex.
Instead of just mashing faces and jabbing tongues, use all five of your senses while you kiss your lover.
Open your eyes sometimes to look at your partner’s facial features and think about what you like about them.
Have you ever listen to the sound when you make-out? I didn’t know I moaned during kissing until someone pointed it out to me!
Pheromones! Take in the scent of their hair and breath and natural smells.
Taste? Besides the taste of their mouths, you can incorporate foods like fruit and enjoy their flavors together.
Has anyone ever held your face while deeply kissing you? It’s thrilling and amplifies the moment. Touching other areas of the face can also be a turn-on. Play around and see what works.
Slow it Down
“Try touching each other, and understanding that everything is more about pleasure first, and then the orgasm comes after,” Singh says.
Go through foreplay slowly and thoroughly. This is not the time to deep throat like a porn star. Focus on every moment and movement that you both make. Take the time to appreciate different parts of their body, even something simple like a birthmark or bellybutton.
While there’s no definite answer to how many different types of orgasm a woman can have, the most common one is clitoral.
The key to making it tantra is to focus on breathing while your partner is pleasuring you. Occasional eye contact is also helpful.
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Original by Jordie Lee